I wanted to come in here and vent..vent out my frustrations. Be it with myself, for letting me fall behind or at "you" for not realizing who and what I am all about after all these years..and still not seeing it. I have changed in ways that hardly anyone will ever understand - you have no idea how much it kills me inside to not be able to show that side. See, I don't know whether I'm scared or have just pushed you that far away from me. Maybe its a little bit of both. I know that you love me an
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Sat Feb 09, 2008 3:38 am
because you must taali to the music --->
Tue Feb 12, 2008 10:40 pm
Obama
Fri Feb 15, 2008 2:55 am
I shouldn't. I don't want to.
But...
I wish to say fuc k you. ... Fuc k you for making me feel like I don't matter or worse yet - exist.
I won't though, I don't know whats to come...
There's hope..
Prove me wrong.
Whatever you do.
Don't make these little doubts into reality.
But if you do forget, then fuc k you, but most of all th
I wish I could write about the way I am feeling just now
but you see the problem is
I’m not really f e e e e e l i n g
much of anything these days
and I’m like a blank slate
this steel wall
has been erected
between me
and who I really am
and I don’t have enough left of me to really care
there’s nothing left inside of here
no emotion
no heart
no words
to explain what is happening to me
falling deeper into this pit of mock-despair
watching the world spin beneath me
sucked into th
...there are somedays where this is all that my life seems like... i sit there staring at this blank page ...and as i sit i am consumed by this blackness that surrounds me...reminding me my life has been a failure...i have nothing to show for all my accomplishments...but no matter how hard i try to put something on it...i cant... i try so hard too...but no...so it stays blank and becomes so
The long unmeasured pulse of time moves everything.
There is nothing hidden that it cannot bring to light,
nothing once known that may not become unknown.
Nothing is impossible.
-Sophocles, Ajax
2007 started out with a ? and now that is about to end its still filled with a ?.
I'm still looking for that sign.
Where are you?
I don't know if I can go on any longer deceiving and misleading myself and everyone else around me.
If this isn't it, then will you help me find it?
05-30-2008 10:37 AM 
