Friend or foe

[Fairy]

Friend or foe
Bad friendships can affect your whole life. Use our guide to assess your relationships.

Women are inclined to hang on to friendships for too long, even if the friendship has gone bad. We are sentimental creatures and will often stay friends with someone because we've known them for a long time, because we believe a friend will change for the better, or because we like her.

But friends are there to help each other, so if you're the only one doing all the work and all your friend is doing is taking without putting anything back into the friendship, you should ask yourself what you're gaining from the relationship.

Sandy Sheedy, author of Connecting: The Enduring Power of Female Friendship (William Morrow) says you should honestly ask yourself: What is she doing for me?

If you suspect some of your friendships might have a rotten core, you should sort the good apples from the bad. Sandy says the moment a friend makes you feel bad about yourself, influences you negatively, or if you only hear from her when things aren't going well, and you'd rather do your nails than chat to her, chances are the friendship has passed its sell-by date.

Borrower Bree
She loves borrowing stuff, but never returns anything – books, clothes or your grandmother's serving platter that has so much sentimental value.
Deal with her Speak to her directly about the problem. If she doesn't listen, simply stop lending her things and see how that affects the friendship.

Self-centred Sue
She's only capable of talking about one thing: herself. You will only do things she enjoys. She thinks nothing of inconveniencing you if it suits her.
Deal with her Draw her attention to her self-centred behaviour. Talk about yourself more, and if she isn't willing to listen, why are you still friends with her?

Back-stabbing Bette
She will talk about you behind your back. She excels at deception and seduction, and she might even try to seduce your partner. Chances are you've never suspected her, but look out for these danger signs: she never leaves your friends' partners alone, or she only ever has bad things to say about her other friends.
Deal with her There is only one way to deal with a woman who betrays you or tries to seduce your partner: get away from her as fast as you can.

Competitive Kate
She wants to do everything that you're doing, and then some. She always has to compete. If your child starts walking, her child will be walking and reciting the entire alphabet – at only 18 months!
Deal with her If it's healthy competition both of you will flourish as a result, but if it makes you unhappy, you should reconsider the friendship.

Depressed Diane
When she comes to visit, she brings a grey cloud with her. It's one thing if a friend is going through a difficult time, but it's quite another when her negative outlook on life becomes a habit, and makes you feel depressed.
Deal with her Try to include her in uplifting activities, but if she always makes you feel down, you should reconsider the friendship.

Controlling Carol
She wants to order everyone around, especially her friends. She always tells you what to do and gets angry if you take important decisions without her. She also decides which movies you see, and where you sit. Unless she's prepared to give up some control, your friendship will be one-sided.
Deal with her Tell her you'd like to make your own decisions about things affecting your life, and that you should take turns deciding about social and everyday things.

Maintain good friendships
Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes, and that misunderstandings are a common occurrence. There is only one way to keep a friendship healthy: talk about it.
Talk about things before they get out of control. Discuss an issue the moment it starts bothering you, and then give the other person the opportunity to explain their side.

[Miss_Sweet]

nice post :bg:

[unexpected]

Nice post Appi.. :givefl; .....
Thnx 4 sharing

[KOHINOOR]

Nice Post Aisha Aapi :giveflower;

[RAHEN]

v.understanding post- zabardast post fairy sis :givefl;

shukar Al hamdAllah ma best frnd has none of these bad qualities and yes she is dear to me and i m lucky in this matter shukar al hamdAllah

Thanks 4 sharing

[Fairy]

Masha-Allah Rahen

Thanks sweeties :hug1:

[Endurer]

Sweet :giveflower; That will help me in the long run.

[Fairy]

Thank you

[bleh]

wow actually never thought that knid way.. thanks!

[Fairy]

Thanks for reading